ok. so I got like 13 post in my box that say " Go Ahead, and stream it live " and etc. Then I got almost 7 post from people saying "Dont do it man, you got alot to live for" including TomFulp and Parlux.

Listen, Life to me isn't exactly worth living at the moment. Im not Emo, Im just not happy with how my life is going. I belive in God So I cant take my anger out on anyone so everything happening to me, its locked up and builds inside of me and hurts. It does. Im sure most of you have had times where you think " God I wish I were Dead " , well thats me every moment of the day, so it would just end. I know a friend who commited suicede from the "Choking Game". I have had alot of friends die, literely and relationship-wise. My "Friends" I had, every single one, turned on me eventually because another kid told them to so my life is just an empty thing, wasteing away.

Im not doing this like that other guy who said he commited suicide and a mod "I think Life" posted a thread about it and turned out he faked it.
Im not being dramatic and faking like he did.*shoot I cant think of the name* but I might go through with this. Im just not sure but alot of people dont care if I died or not. the people who would are only Parlux, Tom, probally April, the other people who PMed me. My parents say they would but if they did they would care about my health with smoking, maybe spending atleast a moment with me rather then going out with your 48 year old GF who smokes alot and is a bad influence. *My Dad and his GF/ My Mom and her job, friends, and online dating*

Really guys, My family literally ignores me. they just leave money on the counter to go get something to eat, take me somewhere every once in awhile, and pay the bills. but then they're off to do their own thing.

Newgrounds, after every person I've turned to, i've only got oyu and God left.
Life is confusing and cruel.